Newbies (AND a few of you veterans), here is a scrip to follow so that your not looking like an idiot on the phone. Remember, an escort can't discuss money or sex over the phone, so be ready for her to tell you that if you ask. Make sure that you've read her ad fully. Don't just look at the pictures and then call. Make sure you know which activities she offers and her rates. If she has blessed you with a website, GO THERE. Everything you need to know is there. AND ladies, if your websites aren't up to par or half assed done, then take some time to update it. You would be surprised at the amount of men that will patronize you based on your website content and its details.
Remember, we are all in this together. Escorts need clients, and clients need companionship. This is not "Hookers at the point" or "Pimps up ho's down", so leave that jive talking "Hey baby what's up" shit at home. Remember to be as polite and professional as possible.
(Escort) Hello, this is "Bunny"
(Client) Yes, my name is_____, and I saw your ad in the Riverfront times and I would like to know your availability for this evening.
(Escort) Yes, thank you for calling. I have an opening this evening at 6pm. Have you previously seen any other providers?
(Client) No, this is my first experience with a provider, but I'm willing to give you any information that you need to feel safe with me.
Now remember, since the economy is real slow right now, many escorts are taking a chance by seeing clients with no references, so be kind and polite and give the escort any information that she requests, and she'll more than likely accept you.
Men remember that your phone conversation should be kept to a minimum. Whenever I have newbies call that feel like being chatty, I cut it short. That's not being rude, that's stopping both me and the man from saying anything incriminating over the phone.
Ladies, go with your gut if you're not sure about a particular man. Sometimes those butterflies are actually your intuition kicking in. These are tough times right now, both economically and crime statistically, so make sure your getting as much information as possible from these men. No longer accept men who use "screen names" instead of their real names, especially if he's new to the game.
Lastly - Men, if you are an honest newbie with no intentions to harm, simply ask the escort what you need to do in order to reassure her that you're safe. Just being open and willing to share makes a HUGE difference in an escorts decision to accept a newbie client.
Have fun and be safe...
I knew that there was something special about this trainer when I drove up to the facility and all the women were lined up against the wall outside in Military precision. Each and every woman had the exact same uniform. Black spandex pants, white shirts, white tennis shoes and fitness gloves. Each woman had a back pack filled with the basic work-out necessities. Floor mat, knee pads, towel, water bottle, and hand weights.
So that I didn’t look like the stupid new girl, I jump in line and follow the precession of ladies inside the building. The building is small, with 3 areas for the levels of fitness.
The Nazi walks in, and the women are quiet as a mouse, they line up against the wall as he continuously one by one calls them fat lazy slobs.. He’s brutal, he’s mean, he’s insulting, he’s narcissistic, he’s arrogant, and he’s FABULOUS! I mean FABULOUS!
After he verbally assaults every woman in class, he looks over at me and says…”What the FUCK do you want fat Girl”? I look at him and yell: “To get healthy SIR”. He then tells me to get my Fat ASS in line and don’t say SHIT. I run over and take my place in line.
After every woman in class got weighed in and cussed out for not making their weight loss weekly goals, he then splits the women up into their classes and gives them their work out instructions. The women work out for the hour, all under the stress of being called fat, lazy, retarded, crack heads, and a host of other derogatory names, but the women seem un-phased, and they keep on going. Some of the woman were at the brink of passing out, but they still pushed themselves to avoid the wrath of Hitler. With sweat dripping and sore bodies, these women WORKED it.
The end of the hour came and he told the women to stop, stretch, and breathe. After about 10 mins of stretching and breathing, he then says: You FAT mother fuckers are THA BOMB, now take your shit and go home and rest! See you tomorrow!
YES YOU SURE WILL…..
I've learned that if you want things to be done a certain way, then you have to tell folks how to do them. Because on Saturday after I place my ads, I begin to get a TON of phone calls from guys I'd love to choke.
Some of these men have the worst phone etiquette on earth, and I'm going to put a stop to that. Believe it or not, the #1 reason why an Escort starts hating her job is because of what goes on before the actual "bump n grind" (the administrative part of the job); and having to put up with all these crazy ass personalities calling her late at night and in the wee hours of the mornings can make a chick crazy. Ugh...
Many escorts are now requesting that men DO NOT CALL, and to book sessions through their websites, all because of the men that don't follow directions well. All that we ask is for men to READ OUR WEBSITES before you call. If you read the site, you already won half the battle. You already know my rate, my personality, my rules, and my likes and dislikes. So calling and asking a TON of redundant questions is going to make you look silly.
But I can't be rude, because I love this fucking job, and the last thing I want to do is step on toes....
So I'm going to do this for you.
I'm going to put together a script that you can copy and paste into your email correspondence with an escort. I'm also going to create you a little script for better phone etiquette; because GOD knows you young boys need it the most.
Stay tuned for that....
I see TONS of silly working girls who are unaware of the laws, in particular, the entrapment laws. Cops can pretty much do whatever they want in order to arrest you. They can fuck you on Monday, then come back and arrest you on Tuesday. Don't be fooled!
Q: Do cops always have to identify themselves when asked?
A: No. A common misconception is that people can identify an undercover officer by asking if they're a cop. The officers can legally say no.
This happened earlier this month when the Seattle police Vice Unit conducted a prostitution sting near the West Precinct. Officers were wearing plain clothes and driving regular vehicles. In at least two of the incidents, the alleged prostitutes asked an undercover officer if he was a cop. The officer said no. They agreed to a sex act for $40 and were arrested. One of those was found to have a Department of Corrections warrant for escape.
"How could you possibly do undercover work if you didn't lie under certain circumstances?" police spokesman Jeff Kappel said, adding officers also lie in some scenarios to protect officer safety. In some undercover operations, officers pose as utility workers, mail carriers or package delivery people. Police also lie in some interrogation scenarios and can do so legally. But officers can't lie to get you to commit a crime you wouldn't otherwise commit. That's entrapment, spelled out in section 12A.04.109 of the Seattle Municipal Code: SMC 12A.04.190 Entrapment.
A. In any prosecution for a crime, it is a defense that: 1. The criminal design originated in the mind of law enforcement officials, or any person acting under their discretion; and 2. The actor was lured or induced to commit a crime which the actor had not otherwise intended to commit. B. The defense of entrapment is not established by a showing only that law enforcement officials merely afforded the actor an opportunity to commit a crime.
Bottom line ladies...
Screen screen screen!
Yesterday was so slow and boring that I decided to watch an entire season of Dog the Bounty Hunter. Yeah, I know his racist banter back in 2007 kind of angered me since I'm such a huge fan of the show. But I began thinking to myself, well at least there's no mystery to how he feels about black folks, and with that knowledge I proceed with caution. Instead of purchasing the season on DVD like I'd normally do, I downloaded it for free. It's a weird love hate relationship with that show, but I vowed to NEVER financially support it again. My dad bought me a Dog the Bounty Hunter t-shirt when he and my mom went to Hawaii a few years back, and it was like getting a winning lottery ticket. This was before Dog's racist rant; my dad would NEVER EVER do that again. Hes a lot less forgiving than I am.
It felt really good catching up with my favorite TV family and all their crazy shenanigans while catching criminals.
After watching Dog, I decided to take a few pictures of myself for my website. Their not great by a long shot, but they'll do the job till I get motivated to do better ones.
Hope you enjoy....
Although I've never had this issue with a girl, probably because I have my own special way of screening men, it's still a problem that's discussed on tons of escorting message boards. I recently heard of well known escorts being shady when it came to sharing clients and giving references; and when this happens, it hurts the client as much as it hurts us, because lets face it - if an escort won't refer you, then you can't partake in the wonderful benefits of experiencing other escorts.
Then you have the escorts wanting references and have absolutely NOTHING but the guys screen name on some message board. I mean - come on ladies, you got to do better than that. These men change screen names like I change my underwear and they definitely can't be screened by just a handle. Make sure that you get as much information about the guys as possible. I'm not going to go fishing for his information just to give you a reference. Whenever I contact ladies for references, I make sure to ad his Name, phone #, email address, age, and the approx last time he's seen you. Oh, and it would be helpful if you introduced yourself to me first. Part of the whole phenomenon with escort's not giving references probably has to do with the lack of phone etiquette that you put out. I've had ladies call with as much personality as dry oatmeal, but I guess this is no personality contest, and warming me up is no concern of hers.
But the lesson to be learned is; References are important to us all. They keep us safe from the crazies, cops, and robbers. And In the end though, if you want to be shady with giving references, or continue sending half-assed references requests to others, then be ready to take risks, because it's going to become increasingly hard to get references from escorts when you don't reciprocate properly. And the last thing you need in this industry is taking unnecessary risks.
I'm taking today off to spend some mommy/son time with my kid, and I'll probably meet my mom at her job for lunch later, but we'll see.
Friday I took my son to see Friday the 13th after taking yet another vacation day from my regular 9-5. It seems like every other week I'm taking a vacation day to either spend more time with my son, or to get some important errands ran. Needless to say, it felt really good not having to punch the clock!
Saturday was Valentines Day, so I spent a great deal of that morning posting my ads and getting ready for my evening with clients. After everything was set up, cleaned, and in its proper place, I met my mom and dad for a Valentines Day Brunch at the Omega Center. The brunch was fabulous as the guest speaker talked about black history and black love which are two of my favorite subjects. Later that evening I had two wonderful clients; one from India (we talked about slumdog millionaire the whole time) and the other drove here from Branson. After my clients left, I jumped in the shower and got ready to meet a good friend for sushi.
Sadly, my favorite sushi place was "reservation only" because of Valentines Day, so we ended up going to Casa Gallardo instead. After we left Casa, my friend wanted to go to a few clubs, but I declined because I was REALLY tired. We kissed goodbye and he walked me to my car and I sped off home!
Sunday I had to work, but when I got off, I went to my parent's house to watch a few bootleg movies. "Quarantine" was good, and "George W" was OK.
I'm going back over there today to chill and watch "Valkyrie".
I am by far the nicest prostitute that a man will ever meet. I'm kind, giving, funny, and very helpful when need be. But let me set the record straight. A newbie can sometimes make the nicest escort want to choke the hell out of him. So to make the newbies first experience with a prostitute more enjoyable, I have compiled a list of things that a newbie should know and follow to make his first "Ho" experience more enjoyable.
Fist things first, do your homework! This is by far the most important advice that I can give you. And I know it may be time consuming, especially if you're out of town, in a hotel room, and want to get laid like right NOW. What the newbie must realize is that by not taking the time to do your homework, you could be inviting someone into your space that's as undesirable as Bubba the sissy from the county jail. So do your homework!
Read reviews. Every well known escort has them. The two main review boards in the World are Theeroticreview.com and bigdoggie.net
Since it's your first encounter, I would HIGHLY recommend that you seek out established girls and stay the hell away from Craigslist. I know sometimes you're in a money crunch and your balls are filled with semen, but trust me on this one. Look for the girls with the good reputations. It's always better to be safe than sorry.
Almost 100% of providers require that potential clients have references, and this is where your charm needs to kick in. Before you go cold calling prostitutes trying to score a date with your newbie status, I suggest that you sign up for a pre-screening services such as http://www.roomservice2000.com/
After you've signed up, make sure to keep your information handy such as your Roomservice and Datecheck ID. When you email the escort, be sure to have this information handy and include it in your correspondence with her. REMEMBER, she is risking a LOT by being an escort, so it is her JOB to tell you NO if for some reason she doesn't feel comfortable doing business with you. Make sure that your email correspondence is as polite, professional and informative as possible. Being crude or vulgar makes you look like a retard, so refrain from using phrases like "What do you have open today besides those legs"? Never try to be cute or humorous because it can go over disastrously. I have found that many escorts are not interested in your humor as a newbie.
If by the grace of God she accepts your appointment request without references, ALWAYS remember to be on your best behavior. Don't make her go on all the private escorting forums telling us how she hates newbies.
Last but not least, have fun and be safe!
Happy Valentines Day!
Now don't get me wrong because I am everything that I say I am; witty, smart, articulate, and ambitious. But I sometimes I just want to peel away those top layers and reveal what's really at the core, like self-consciousness, loneliness, and boredom. Not bored with escorting, because escorting is actually pretty exciting. I mean bored with my life in general. I don't have any friends because I'm a loner, and to be honest, this industry isn't the easiest to make friends in. So many escort girls have come and gone from my life in a span of 5 years that I feel like a revolving door. Now I'm a little more careful with whom I allow myself to be bothered with.
Clients are the same, and although they tend to me a little more loyal than the escorting population, they still have the tendency to come and go at the drop of a hat. I like my clients though, and I don't have the desire to have close knit relationships with them, because that fucks up business. I can't begin to tell you how easy it is to fuck up your cash flow by becoming friends with clients. Once friendships seep in, then in becomes increasingly hard for me to accept money from them, let alone have sex.
Once we become friends, sex flies out the window. That's why I discourage clients from asking me out on dates, and I NEVER under any circumstances go to their homes off the clock. I think my friendly nature gives these men the wrong impression. I'm still a hooker first and foremost, and getting paid is why I do this in the first place. I can't come right out and say that to a client because it's kind of cruel and shallow, but it's true. Getting paid is the main motivation, but it's not the only motivation.
Now as I've stressed a million times over, I adore my clients, and have nothing but love for them. But the less I'm attached, the more they want to come back. It's strange I know, but it's true. I guess in the end, in the big scheme of things, I'm happy, because I REALLY am. I wake up daily excited about life and the idea of having a man or men adore and worship me, even if it's only for an hour. My complaints are relatively small. I don't have a substance abuse problem, I don't have a pimp, I have piece of mind, I have money, and I have a great family, great clients, and few good escort friends.
I'm pretty damn good right now!
This is the case with the Porn star that I'm featuring today: SINNAMON LOVE
Ok, I've been familiar with Sinnamon for a while because she keeps a blog at escortblogs.com. But it was her blog on blogspot.com that caught my attention. Sinnamon is a woman that I would refer to as an "Alpha Diva".
An "Alpha Diva" is a woman that encompasses every quality that a powerful and intriguing woman posses. She's a loving mother, she's multi-talented, she's sexy, she's nasty, she's intelligent, and she seems like a hell of a lot of fun to be around.
I'm addicted to reading her blogs as well as watching her films. She is everything that I aspire to be in the adult industry, and yet her profile isn't as high as Jenna Jamison or even Janet Jacme, but still, shes a total package to say the least.
AND, she's not all made up with super fake tits like most porn bitches out there....
You Go Girl......
(Click image to view preview)
I'm starting to get geared up for my Valentine week special. I'm going out today to round up several bottles a good wine and Champagne, not the cheap stuff I drink on a regular, but the good stuff that actually cost more than 6 bucks. I'm also contemplating on whether or not to add a fruit or cheese platter to my menu, because more than likely, my clients won't even touch it because they're usually to horny to eat anything. Any way it goes, I'll still be busy that week, and that's all I want.
But anyway, on to some non-kinky stuff. My mom is so damn adamant about my younger brother not marrying his girlfriend, that she literally had a nervous breakdown while yelling at him on the phone. It was kinda funny watching her loose it because she HATES this girl. But anyway, she's angry because the girl got pregnant less than a month after moving in with my brother, so now he's manning up and wanting to marry the girl. And although I think the situation is fucked up also, I still commend my brother for wanting to do the right thing by this girl.
But because he's my baby brother (he's 28), I still think that they rushed into this mommy/daddy role too quickly, and I can't help but to believe that this was purposely done by her. But I'm not gonna sit there and say that she trapped my bother because he's a grown man, and men should be accountable for what happens when they stick unprotected dicks in girls pussies. Babies come out!
But anyway, I'm going to wait and see how this all pans out. My mother has stressed to him that she's not supporting his wedding or him any longer, and my dad is on her side, so right now my baby brother is up a shit creek financially, and he has a baby on the way, along with his girlfriend's 2 year old son to support. Oh the drama....
Oh well, Here's the link to my newest column. It's not kinky or anything, but it talks about my trip to Paris in 08. Enjoy!
Well let me rephrase that, SOME drag queens are beautiful. I'm specifically referring to the ones who perform in night clubs and pageants for a living. Not you're average Joe that likes wearing panties and wigs for his own sexual gratification. I'm talking about the queens that actually take the time to create their alter ego which sometimes takes YEARS to perfect.
I've met drag queens in the past that make us real girls look like hot garbage. And these women impersonators will spend an excess of $1000 per pageant costume, and that doesn't include hair, makeup, and jewelry. Some of these impersonators can deliver with such elegance and femininity that it's almost impossible to believe that they are actually men, or were born male. Even in a bathing suit is it impossible to decipher whether or not the performer is a male or female.
I've become so envious of their beauty and elegance, that I would often times frequent the gay clubs just to watch them perform. Watching them was not only entertaining, but like getting the best beauty and poise education a woman can get, and all it costs you is club admission, which is usually around $10. I'm always amazed at the amount of time that drag queens take to put their looks together; sometimes having private tailors to custom make dresses and performance costumes that reminded me of sheer opulence and wealth. Some of the costumes reminded me of old Hollywood where women were feminine and glamorous, and once I get in shape and re-emerge as a new women, I will hold some of those same qualities that I adore in both drag queens and old Hollywood.
Because God knows, in this day in age, glamour has gone straight out the door and has made way for trash and non-class to seep in, and I'm seeking to change that!